James Wallace Harris, 6/22/25
Before I retired in 2013, I assumed I’d have all the time in the world to do everything I ever wanted once my 9-to-5 burden was lifted. However, I have done less and less each year. I’m still disciplined about doing my chores and meeting my responsibilities, but the discipline needed to pursue my hobbies and pastimes is dwindling away.
I’m not depressed, I eat right and exercise regularly, and I have a positive outlook. I just don’t spend my free time on hobbies like I once did. Instead, I churn through the YouTube videos or play on my iPhone during idle moments. I hear that’s also a problem for kids, so maybe it’s not aging, but it feels age-related.
Why do I think that? Well, for one, it seems like people slow down when they get older. Here’s what happens. I’ll be working on an objective I consider fun. For example, I got a new Ugreen NAS and was setting it up to use Jellyfin as a media server. The task is tedious because it’s new and has a steep learning curve. I work at it for a bit, feel tired, and decide to put it away for the day. When I was younger, I could work on a tedious problem for hours. Now I can’t.
Do I quit quickly because my older mind can’t handle the task? Or has all that web surfing, channel hopping, and doom scrolling weakened my discipline? I became addicted to audiobooks in 2002 and have read less since, is another example.
This is a kind of chicken-and-egg problem. Has technology weakened my mind? Or was my mind slowing down, and technology is a useful adaptation? I have read more books since the advent of Audible.com.
Here’s another bit of evidence. When I worked full-time, I did far more after work than I do with unlimited free time in retirement. I didn’t have an iPhone back then. Why didn’t I put the same number of work hours into my hobbies after I retired? Did being free of work responsibilities ruin my discipline?
I shouldn’t agonize over this problem if doing less is part of aging. However, does retiring make us age faster? Is technology making us lazier? I have no answer.
I could test things by limiting my screen time. My emotional reaction to that idea is about what a thirteen-year-old feels when a parent tells them they need to cut back on their screen time.
I’m constantly thinking about aging. Philosophically, it’s an interesting concept. Comparing it to the old nature vs. nurture debate, I would consider aging a problem of decay vs. mind. We know we will all end up as worm food. The challenge is to be the most interesting and creative worm food before we’re eaten. The insidiousness of aging is accepting that it’s time to be eaten.
JWH
Auxiliary Memory 
Might it be be due to the apathy associated with white matter changes in the brain?
Same. Think it’s aging, not technology. If you didn’t have your face in a smartphone or Youtube you’d be spending hours reading the paper or watching TV. I suspect we just have less energy when we age.
Same. Think it’s aging, not technology. If you didn’t have your face in a smartphone or Youtube you’d be spending hours reading the paper or watching TV. I suspect we just have less energy when we age.
I tend to think that’s the obvious answer, but I want to fight aging.
Paul, remember when you first started the SF short story group on Facebook? For a long time, even years, I read every story every day. Now I can’t keep up. I think aging and loss of energy is mostly at fault, but I think there are other factors. After reading hundreds of stories it has gotten much harder to find stories that engage me. I’ve become jaded to short science fiction. Maybe I’ve become jaded to my other favorite activities too.
I think that’s probably burnout; a different thing entirely. I suspect the same would have happened in your 40s if you’d read that much.
Boy James, that one hit home HARD. It is probably no consolation at all, but I am EXACTLY the same, but in my case there is another factor which is far greater than screen time. I retired in 2010 age 56 and am now 71. I keep a diary and I see the first mention of aging is at the beginning of my 68th year, yes only 3 years ago (2022). Up until that time I felt around 45 years old, I will pull this all together in a bit. I have said many times during my retirement that every day feels like a holiday, and to some extent that is still true, but there still seems to be “mental handcuffs” that I cannot shake from my earlier work days. Two examples. Why do I still treat weekends like weekends? There’s absolutely no need for that in retirement. Every day should be like every other day, a holiday. My major hobby is astrophotography, which of course requires staying up late at night. I did far more astrophotography when I had the day job than I have in retirement! Why do I even think it is a problem to stay up late at night now when I don’t even have a job to go to in the morning? I have no idea, but the worry of staying up late is now worse if anything than when I had the day job – this is ridiculous. I have a home gym, built after retirement, and I am now stronger (but not fitter) than I have ever been, so it is not physical laziness taking its toll.
You are quite correct that screen time is a major problem. If you have read any books on the subject of retirement, then you will have read that daytime TV is a big no no, and looking at your monitor for a large part of the day is no different from daytime TV. Now I personally was not too bothered about daytime TV rotting my brain and I thought I would spend quite a bit of daytime viewing catching up on films, which I haven’t actually done. However, sitting in front of the monitor Googling and looking at Social Media is mentally lazy and almost completely non-productive, it also wastes an unbelievable amount of time (which is even now more valuable than before). Googling and Social Media make you “feel” as if you are doing something constructive, when in effect you are doing nothing at all of any consequence. No wonder the kids of today are in big trouble.
Now we come to the one thing you didn’t mention, but I know for a fact that this is probably the biggest aging problem for me. Covid! Yes, bloody Covid. My note in the diary about aging came just 2 years into Covid, and my wife and I are still very careful about going out, effectively we are still socially isolating. This is extremely damaging to your mental health, probably more so that screen time. This is particularly odd in my case as I am not a social person, I have never gone to pubs, and don’t have any friends (apart from the wife). However, it’s just the thought of not being able to go out and grab a brunch, or fish and chips, whenever you want that I think is extremely damaging, and adds considerably to the feeling of aging, if not to aging itself. Then of course, if you are spending more time around the house, then you are more likely to waste that time on screen time.
A friend of mine (I do have a couple I suppose, but he lives many miles away) unfortunately retired in 2020. He took a lot of what I said about retirement, about it like being on holiday every day, and retired with a very positive mental attitude. However, as you see, he retired at precisely the same time that Covid came along, and it was only a year later that he said that he wasn’t enjoying his retirement very much at all. Poor bloke 🙁 I explained what the problem was, and he saw that it was Covid that was indeed the issue. He made some changes on his outlook and his daily routine, and he has done better since, but it was a fairly tough fight.
Let’s return to your first paragraph. You DO now have all the time in the World to do everything you wanted to do now you don’t have the day job, but you have to eliminate those things that use up that time with no positive outcome, and that means screen time. Use that wasted screen time to draw, paint, photograph, garden, swim, travel, and pursue your hobbies, and see how quickly the aging stops. Good luck.
Greg, I had forgotten about Covid, but that’s a great call. Before Covid I went to the movies once or twice a week with friends. I also ate out regularly with my wife and friends. I also visited people at their homes. All of that died away with Covid. We still have a weekly game afternoon with friends, and we have people over for Saturday dinners, but not as often as before Covid. During Covid I decided not to drive anymore at night. I still see just as well at night, but it just seems safer to stay home. In fact, I’ve gotten so I hate to be away from home.
By the way, I used to be into astronomy. I had a four inch refractor, and went to the monthly astronomy club meetings. But I got tired to driving an hour to our dark sky site. I quit astronomy just as CCD cameras were becoming affordable. I wanted to get into astrophotography, but at the time it involved a steep learning curve.
I still feel I’m enjoying retirement because I keep busy with little things, and I’m still fairly social. Not like before Covid, but I see some friends weekly, and others fairly often.
Still, I want to be more productive with my time. And I do consider some aspects of social media positive. I’m in a Facebook group that discusses one science fiction or fantasy short story a day. It’s connected me with a number of people around the world. It’s also connected me with people who share this rather obscure interest.
OK, a woman’s point of view… i’m 78 and have been retired since I was 55. I’ve also been a widow since I was 66 and I have no children. My husband was the type of man who wasn’t that social and mostly wanted it to be just the two of us. At the time that was fine with me, but I had no hobbies.
10 years ago, I moved back to my home state, bought a lovely home, developed some hobbies and discovered talent I never knew I had. I also have several close female friends, also widowed, and I go out several times a week and have a drink some interesting conversation and a good dinner. These are not typical women whose only conversation is about their grandchildren.
I also spend a good bit of time on my iPad, but I get a lot of newsletters and blogs and it takes me the morning to read through them with a couple of cups of coffee and breakfast.
No TV until around 4 o’clock or later. I do garden a bit, and that is sort of like my therapy, as I enjoy being outside in nature.
While I do occasionally get lonely and miss being married, for the most part, I’m happier than I’ve ever been in my life. My energy level is not what it used to be and I don’t like to cram too many things into one week, much less a day. I like a simple life, a rather slow life. I make no morning appointments and I can definitely tell I’ve slowed down, but that’s OK with me, as I want an stress-free as life as possible.
I think too much screen time or too much YouTube time depends on what you’re watching or reading about. There is a lot of really interesting stuff out there and I like feeding my mind.
Mary, what’s the talent you never knew you had? Was it writing?
Landscape painting, painting and distressing furniture to make it look old, making costume jewelry. I do like writing but more in the way of being a journalist.
After I wrote this essay I ran across this article. I’m not the only one with attention span issues. Evidently, folks of all ages are worried about losing their ability to focus.
How to Fix a Low Attention Span
Oh James, just go with the flow. The thing that surprises me is that the things I was expecting to do in retirement aren’t what I am doing. I’ve learnt new skills and enjoying honing them. The body parts are wearing out and I need to rest more each year but I’m learning to live with that. I must say that screen time has increased in the last 6 months and even though I’m in Australia I’ve discovered a sudden fascination with US politics. So let’s just take it as it comes and age disgracefully.