by James Wallace Harris, 4/25/24
My backyard is an example of entropy in action. Working in my yard is a never-ending battle between chaos and order. If I had my wish, I’d move to a retirement condominium so I wouldn’t have to worry about a yard, or any kind of house maintenance. However, with rising HOA fees, and private equity takeovers, that wish could turn bad, and we’d be homeless. I see our paid for house as our last bastion of security, so I want to hang onto this home as long as possible.
Regarding yardwork, I must choose between two options. Either I pay someone to do it, or I do it myself. I’m not keen on either option. I’ve known lots of folks who got into gardening as they got older, and they found enjoyment and exercise in the pursuit. Right now, I strongly dislike working in my yard. I wonder if I can change my spots. Since I find hiring people frustrating, I’m agonizing over choosing between two things I don’t want to do.
My front yard is mostly weeds and dirt. My friend Annie told me how she was seeding her lawn with mini clover and told me about all its advantages. So, I ordered a couple pounds of mini clover seeds from Amazon. It’s been fun seeing it come up, that is until the lawn guys mowed the lawn for the first time this year. I had texted them to raise the cutting height to three inches. They didn’t. My front lawn was sheared so close to the ground that nearly everything green is gone. That annoyed the crap out of me. Like they say, if you want something done….
The mini clover can be trained to grow just 3-4 inches high, so after a few mowings it will require no more mowing. If I really want that to happen, I need to buy a mower and mow the lawn myself. Unfortunately, I don’t have any place to keep a mower. So, I’d also need to buy a storage shed. And if I fire my yard guys, I’d also need to buy a blower, trimmer, and chainsaw. And if I got into landscaping, like I need to do, I’d also need to buy a wheelbarrow and other gardening tools. This is getting expensive and a commitment.
My friend Leigh Ann hired a yard planner. He produced a 24-page document advising her on how to beautifully landscape her yard. I’m thinking about hiring him too, but I want him to advise me to create a simple easy-to-maintain lawn. I don’t want a beautiful, landscaped yard, but a yard the neighbors won’t feel embarrassed to see in the neighborhood.
Our house used to be Susan’s parents’ house. We bought it after they died. They loved working in the yard, and it was nicely landscaped. We’ve neglected the yard for thirteen years, and the landscaping has gone wild. I want a new landscape design that’s easy to maintain.
I rationalize letting it go wild was good for the environment. Birds, insects, and little creatures love it. We even have a possum living out back. However, twice now the utility company has had to hire a crew to cut a path to the power pole during power outages. They don’t tell us to keep our yard clean, but they do give us dirty looks and act mighty unfriendly.
One reason I don’t work in the yard is I have spinal stenosis, and I can only do a limited amount of physical work before I’m in a lot of pain. But I do believe I could put in twenty minutes a day. Susan absolutely refuses to work in the yard.
I theorize I might eventually conquer the yard by working twenty minutes a day and it might even be good for me. Hell, it could even turn into a hobby I enjoy. That seems to happen with a lot of older folks I know. On the other hand, I might invest thousands of dollars and want to give up in a month.
I really would like to make the mini clover work in the front yard. I’ve kind of enjoyed working with it. I go out twice a day to see how it’s doing. It does take a lot of watering, but if I can get it established, the mini clover is supposed to fix nitrogen in the soil and be minimal in maintenance. That would give me a sense of accomplishment if I pulled it off.
Reversing the entropy in the backyard will be a full-scale battle. I’ll need some dangerous power tools to conquer the reemerging forest. I’ll feel bad about killing all those wild bushes and baby trees, especially if they’re sanctuary to wildlife. However, if I want a yard that’s a yard, I will have to do that.
I’m just not sure what to do. I’ve been trying to get away from all my screens and do something real, and yard work is very real. I just don’t know if I can handle it, either physically or mentally. My friend Janis’ father still works in the yard, and he just turned ninety-nine. I wonder if his longevity and vitality come from yard work.
JWH
Auxiliary Memory 
Every word of your first paragraph applies to me. My best option appears to be to cling to the little house I live in. Fortunately, my housemate is the one who likes yard work (in our culture, we always say “garden” for the yard, no matter what the state of the terrain). But unfortuately, she’s a planter. Despite the very small space available to her, she’s forever planting shrubs which later have to be removed again. There is a constant traffic of fronds and branches that have to be removed. She has thoughts of ending up with her daughter in North Carolina, and if that happens (and there’s no news of any developments), I’ll reluctantly have to sell out. Getting someone else to stay with me is unlikely to work. Sigh … getting older.
i’m not sure what to tell you about yr yard; i can dig living in a wildlife refuge. however. with summer on the way, yr vegetation could turn into a fire hazard if the season is more arid than usual. (it’s the sort of thing we worry about in california.) regarding your back, i’d advise finding a good rolfer and working with him for ten sessions and seeing how you feel. (i’ve been into rolfing since my late twenties and it’s kept me from falling completely apart.} hopefully there’s at least one of them in greater memphis. my impression of yr hometown was encapsulated by dennis millers remarked that his agent booked him into a comedy club in memphis. “it was called ‘I DON’T GET IT. jesus, memphis! talk about darwins waiting room.” good luck, mate.
Like you, I want to stay in my house as long as possible. Unlike you, I despise yard work because of my allergies. I have a landscape guy who comes out with his crew and does all the work. Yes, it costs money, but in my mind it’s money well spent. And, you can’t take it with you…
I live in Miami so having a yard was like having another world. I planned it with coconut palms. 2 kinds of grapefruit tree, a mango and avocado, star fruit And a beautiful calamanda tree right next to the back door, Stacy used to make the best calamandon Marmalade, I’ve never had any better in my life. the Grapefruit trees were such a joy to go out and pick one off the low branch . My daughter was visiting during winter break with her friends from Syracuse, New York and it was like paradise for them to just grab fruit off the tree and eat it at the dining room table. So I do miss having a yard.That’s one of the great treats to living in the subtropics’…. J C
i can dig the sense of accomplishment you cats must feel after a long day in the yard,looking forward to a cold beer (stroh’s? miller?) and a hot shower.rather like what hockey players feel like when the klaxon sounds,ending the game. let’s go,panthers,eh!
I do yard work out of guilt. I worry that my neighbors think I’m some kind of slacker or drug dealer.
However, my friend Annie has been touting the virtues of mini clover, and I bought into her religion. I bought some seeds three separate times, sowed them haphazardly, and watered them like crazy. But that’s all. No ground prep. No tilling. No raking.
But I am seeing tiny forests of little, teeny tiny leaves.
I despise lawns: useless swaths of wasteland, that’s what they are. We have an HOA so can’t just let the yard go. I resented buying a lawnmower 2 years ago when we moved in. And hoses. And paying for that extra water! On top of everything else, the builders did zero prep pre-sod so our heavy, gummy clay “dirt” is full of big rocks. A neighbor was digging to try to amend the soil, and she found trash the builders had left behind, like an old water bottle!
I care for the lawn as little as I can get away with. I haven’t bought an edger which means untidy edges. Pretty much like my hair — I cut it back a few times before acknowledging it really, really needs a professional cut.
Last year regular clover “invaded” my yard. After the winter die-off, I’m happy that this spring the clover is taking up even more space. It doesn’t seem to mind being mowed down to 3″.
For your yard, could you compromise? Just mow and leave all the rest to some (new) lawn people? That’s what I tried to do, but I couldn’t find anyone to take me up on it. So last year I spent roughly $600 on a lifeless piece of land. This year we’re trying out one of us mowing the back and the other the front.
Bah! A pox on whoever decided humongous areas of America must be turned into places devoid of wildlife!
I’m still agonizing over what to do. I’m hoping to convince my yard guy to mow the clover with his mower with the wheels all the way down. If he doesn’t, I’ll either buy a mower and shed, or give up on the clover.
I keep telling myself that the backyard is great for critters, but I feel guilty it looks so bad to humans. Whenever I see a show about nature, I’m all for letting my yard go wild. But whenever I see a show about keep up home and yards, I think about cutting it all down.
I hope your clover proves to be an answer. If only you had somewhere to keep a mower, you could make the most visible part of the yard look tidy, and for the rest leave it and put up a sign: Wildlife Sanctuary.
As for the mowing itself, I bought the most lightweight, easy to use, battery operated mower I could find and it’s made the task less grueling. I’m still contemplating the edger … after we’ve done the work of mowing it feels a bit wrong to see the raggedy bits.
Oh, and out of curiosity, how tall does your tiny clover get? Does it grow into a mound like plain old wild clover? The wild clover in my yard grows faster than the grass, so within days of mowing the grass is still tidy looking but the clover is back up to 5-6″ (13-15 cm) and very visible.